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A Woman’s Guide to a Pleasant Retirement
How to Overcome the Midwestern Money Mindset and Give Yourself the Four Permissions
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On a hot summer’s day at age 8, I would cruise on my 1-speed bike around our Lexington, Kentucky neighborhood with my two best friends: Rachel and Alice. And then that sweet jingle could be heard faintly in the distance…
I C E C R E A M T R U C K!
We pedaled as fast as our little legs could, dropped our bikes in the yard, and sprint inside to beg our parents “Just one dollar for ice cream… Pretty please?!”
Sometimes, I left with a dollar in hand. Other times, a firm “No”.
On one of those “No” days, we sat discouraged. Eventually, one of us had the bright idea to make our own money: a lemonade stand!
A little lemon | A lot of sugar | some water….
Bada Boom. Bada Bing. We were in business!
That first earned dollar was so sweet. As was the ice cream purchased with it the next day.
Pride! Excitement! Feeling Accomplished!
.
But not all money we earn carries the same weight.
.
Flash forward: Age 22, working a part-time off-campus job, I was frustrated with my know-it-all, stick-in- the-mud boss. I could suggest no helpful ideas. I was instead told to count pieces of colored paper to see how much we had used for an event.
YES, you read it right… Every. Sheet. Counted.
396 of the red paper, 515 of yellow, 1,049 of lilac… and now the seafoam green…. What a great use of my business degree?
That day I came home and said, “Nate,” (he’s my husband) “I’d rather work in the school cafeteria than continue working for this guy. It’s not worth the money.”
There was no pride, excitement, or sense of accomplishment with my dollars earned.
.
Money flows to us in many different ways throughout our lifetime:
We might earn it.
Save it.
Find it.
Be gifted with it.
Inherit it.
Win it.
Be settled with it.
Or receive it another way.
I like to categorize each of these as different “nest eggs”.
For example: an inheritance from a parent’s passing is one egg, an IRA built through income savings is another, the profit from the house fixed up and sold is a third egg.
If each of the dollar sizes were the same in each egg, would you feel the same about each? No.
A person had to pass away. Grief. A savings account you built. Pride. A home you fixed and sold. Excitement.
The way we receive the money, the triggering event or the person tied to the event … each can shift our emotions toward the nest egg itself.
In fact, if you thought through the different “nest eggs” you hold, you might feel any of the following emotions towards it: anger, anxiety, confusion, happiness, neutrality, numbness, pride, scarcity, sorrow, or another emotion.
Emotions are good. I love emotions.
However, when our emotions mix with our money… well… they can cause some havoc in our finances.
Have you ever thought about the emotions you carry with your different nest eggs?